These past few days have been pretty difficult for me. Easter was good, I got up and the boys and I went to church, then we went to my grandma's for dinner. It was a really nice day up until that night. I've got some issues going on with my landlord and it is causing a huge fight between me and my husband. I don't think I have been this angry since we have gotten back together and worked through our issues. I hate for someone to make me feel like I am stupid and irresponsible. I hate for someone to act like they know more than I do, when they aren't even here to see and hear everything going on. I don't know what to do, I don't know what to say. We haven't talked at all today, and in a way it makes me sad and in a way I know I just don't know what to say, because I am too upset to just act like everything is okay. I miss him so much and with him being gone, it makes these days and these fights so much worse.
Today, I had to work, so I tried to just consume myself with work, but that didn't get me anywheres. People were rude and annoying, and I was just not happy at all. I tried cleaning at work to make time go by faster, but when I started cleaning, I would have a billion people in my line. That was frustrating. When I got off, I went and got a pizza, then paid a bill, and came straight home to clean. I did quite a bit today and it helped to ease some frustration. But now that frustration is back and I am feeling pretty miserable. I just want to be able to have one conversation with my husband where he understands where I am coming from and doesn't turn things into being about me wanting his money. It seems like its always about that, and I think thats what hurts the most. Depression is setting in and its getting the best of me. I just want happy days again, I'd settle for just one..Just as long as I get a whole 24 hours of nothing but happiness...(113 days down)
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